Do you run your house or do your kids? Before you just jump to the typical answer think with me for a second. Do you always eat where your kids want to? Do you find yourself apologizing relentlessly for your kids behavior in public? Is it difficult for you to sit and have an adult conversation without your kids climbing all over you or, if older, constantly interrupting? Do you find yourself telling your kids to do the same thing over and over again, threatening each time with a new punishment, but never doing anything about the disobedience? Do you not believe in spanking? Yes I said it! Spanking! Totally politically incorrect and 100% Biblical.
I hear young parents and watch them struggle with their young kids. I watch as parents allow their kids to tell them what to do and when to do it, only to look in the eyes of an exhausted well-meaning adult who is at their wits end wondering why life is so difficult and why their kids seem to be growing up doing all the things that the parent hoped they would never do. If that is you then allow me to give you some recalibrating tips for your family. If you don’t like them or think they are too archaic then so be it. Live in your misery, but do me a favor, don’t call me for counseling or advice on family, and whatever you do, don’t call me asking for bail money for your wayward child.
1. When your children are young spank them. (Proverbs 13:24, 19:18, 22:15, 23:13-14, 29:15, Hebrews 12:6-7)
2. Take back control of your home. It says to raise a child in the way they should go, however what we see a lot of times is our children training us. (Proverbs 22:6)
3. Say “no”. They will not hate you. Yes they will cry. Yes they will get over it. No they will not die.
4. Refueling them on sugar and then expecting them to sit still is silly. Stop it.
5. Instead of “baby-proofing” a house train your child not to touch or play with dangerous things. All you are doing is teaching them that the world should be baby-proofed. It’s not. There are dangerous things out there, teach them to deal with it.
6. Let them hear you pray for them. When they are very young let them hear you pray for God to protect their future spouse and to even keep their future mate holy.
7. Stop having adult conversations around children. They are kids. They don’t need to know all the adult drama going on in your lives and the lives of those around you.
8. The world does not revolve around your children. It is not all about them. There are other factors at play. Teach them. Train them to interact with a dynamic environment instead of a self-centered view of life.
9. You and your spouse were married before you had the child (usually). Your relationship is more important and takes top priority over your relationship with your children. Husband, model how to treat women to your kids by how you treat your wife. Wives, model how to treat a man by how you treat your husband. Better yet, husbands, treat your wife like you want some guy to treat your daughter…..yea, that’ll make ya think a bit huh?
10. When in doubt of any of these refer back to point one.
Okay, those are my thoughts on the subject. I’m sure many of you might disagree, and that is fine I can deal with it. How is that possible? Because my parents spanked the crap out of me when I deserved it. They taught me that it was not all about me that there are other people in the world. There are other people standing in line behind me and I need to pay attention to my surroundings and respect others. They taught me that my life has extreme value and I should live my life in such a way that it honors God, and if I forgot that at any point in time, they spanked me. No I was not abused. I was loved, encouraged and raised in the fear and admonition of the Lord.
So, who runs your house, you or your kids?